Letting Life Live You: Less Suffering More Possibility

There has been a lot going on recently. Being evacuated and not knowing if the wildfire was going to spread to our neighborhood. The death of a client. Getting sick. Feeling the loss of our dog Bella as at the one year anniversary of her death. But I wasn’t suffering. Even when I was experiencing excruciating pain with a UTI, I noticed I could be with the pain and not suffer.  Previously it would have taken much less for me to be suffering.   There is a quote by Haruki Murakami related to marathon running where he says, “Pain is inevitable, suffering...

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Freedom from Suffering

As soon as I feel the internal pressure to be special or better than, I know I am feeling the opposite -- not special, not good enough. Feelings of unworthiness can be so painful, and there are so many ways to try and escape these feelings. Trying to prove our worthiness by being better than. Numbing out from the pain by using coping mechanisms.   Psychology tells us the problem is an issue that needs to be resolved, but there is no gold to be mined there only an infinite amount of issues that will need fixing. Instead, less suffering is the...

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Who Knew? Letting Yourself Be Human Brings Out the Best in You!

Seeing stress as not being attached to the outside world has completely changed my relationship with it. When I thought my experience of stress was caused by things outside of me, I accepted it. I took it for granted and assumed that I would need things to change on the outside before I could feel better on the inside. When it looks this way, life is hard. Sometimes things aren’t going to change on the outside. Some things are permanent, like the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, not being able to have a biological child.   There...

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There Is Relief From Insecurity Simply From Understanding How the Mind Works

I was recently given feedback in a Mastermind group that I am part of that for someone with so much insecure thinking I sure get a lot done. I don’t know if you ever feel this way, but I feel at times like I am different than other people. I think I am more screwed up, that I am less than, that there is something wrong with me. This definitely happens less than it used to, but it still happens. What is different now is that I am much better than I used to be at ignoring these thoughts and...

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What About Grief?

After writing a blog on the transitory nature of thoughts and feelings and explaining how our feelings come from our thoughts, someone asked me, “What about grief?” From their question, it sounded to me like grief looked like something different than an internally generated experience. They were putting grief into a category of its own and seeing it as more than thought generated -- meaning it looked like their feelings were caused by something outside of themselves, something other than thought.   We all have areas of our lives that look like they fall into a different category than an inside-out generated...

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