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Angus’s Insight About Free Will

Angus has gone through another door of perception. He shares how his experience of seeing free will as a product of the conceptual mind has given him a feeling of greater inner freedom. Rather than seeing himself as separate from God/Mind/Consciousness, recognizing that free will is part of the illusion of thought, allowed him to experience more of the oneness. This is not only freeing for him, but it also helps him to have more compassion for me when I get caught up in my conceptual mind. Now, he is more likely to see my psychological innocence when this happens.   It...

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Reactivity In Relationships Is Normal And Nothing To Be Ashamed Of

Reactivity is normal in relationships. It is a healthy part of the learning curve of being together and navigating separate realities. So often couples come to us with shame about the emotional reactivity in their relationship. Angus and I want to eradicate the shame and normalize that it is okay that upset occurs. It is okay to be learning and growing. None of us have it all figured out.   When we are up against our growing edge, we are stepping beyond our comfort zone and into the unknown. It is there that we can see something fresh and new. We can’t...

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Understanding How The Mind Works, Inner Freedom, and Loving Relationships

Understanding How The Mind Works, Inner Freedom, and Loving Relationships -- what do they all have in common?   Last week’s blog focused on getting comfortable with the ups and downs of the human experience and how that benefits relationships. I scheduled my blog in my newsletter to send on Monday morning, and for the second time, in a not very long period of time, my website went down on a Monday so none of the links in my newsletter worked. This came after a very challenging Father’s Day with one daughter saying she does not feel supported by Angus and me,...

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Being Okay With Your Feelings is the Best Thing You Can Do For Your Relationship

Being okay with your feelings is the best thing you can do for your relationship and all areas of your life.   But how do you do that?   It seems like we innocently live out our beliefs no matter how faulty they might be, and we are at the effect of them emotionally.   How do you get more freedom?   I spent many years of my life searching for that answer first in yoga and meditation practices then in various psychotherapies. I would diligently practice various techniques to try to have less emotional suffering and to experience more inner peace. But it was such hard work....

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A Wide-Open Heart Does Not Discriminate

My heart goes out to the families and communities of the victims of the two mosque shootings in Christchurch, New Zealand. I am heartened that their government’s response is to immediately commit to making changes to their gun laws.  The Islamophobia that fueled the terrorist attacks in New Zealand makes life uncertain and unsafe for Muslims everywhere.   If you want to support grassroots Muslim led organizations working to the support the rights, safety, and dignity of Muslims in the US please click here. Also, Jewish groups in Pittsburgh are also supporting the New Zealand families reciprocating the kindness that was shown to...

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Impossible to Possible: Easier Than You Think

Whether it is trying to solve a crossword puzzle or reconnect in your relationship, the solution comes from the same place: a new thought, a fresh realization, a new way of seeing things. What looks impossible from a sped up, stirred up mind, contracted mind is obvious and common sense when you look at it with fresh eyes and a clear, relaxed, open mind.   Understanding the contracting and expanding nature of your mind makes life so much easier. You don’t need to control or manage yourself when you have a glimpse of how the mind works. With understanding, it is easier...

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Following Inclinations and Christmas Tree Disposal

Angus having to dispose of our Christmas tree in a creative way because he missed the green bin helped him to experience the value of taking action on his inclinations even when he thought they weren’t going to go anywhere. I love that our inner promptings guide us in big and small ways. Often times our intellect tries to talk us out of taking action because it can’t make sense of it. But there is a deeper wisdom at play that we don’t have to figure out. It is only through taking action, moving forward, and gaining momentum that we...

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Angus’ Wail Song

I think we can all relate to getting irritated with our partner. Sometimes it just blows over. Other times it blows up. Angus shares his experience where he felt irritated toward me but then woke up to how he was thinking of all kinds of negative things about me. In seeing what he was doing, it then made sense to him to not keep going down that rabbit hole because he recognized he would just get more stirred up. By understanding that his disturbance was not caused by me, but was actually being created within himself, he saw not to...

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The Ordinariness of Happiness and Peace of Mind!

Wishing you a Happy, Healthy and Prosperous New Year filled with love! May you remember that you are enough exactly as you are and that peace and contentment are your true nature. They are your birthright. There is nothing extra you need to do to experience the essence of who you are. Knowing what direction to look in and letting go, relaxing, allowing and being open is all it takes. You can’t work at it.   I’m looking forward to the upcoming New Year Fresh Start Workshop that Barb Patterson and I are co-facilitating this weekend in Santa Monica! We have a...

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The Best Results Come From Our Natural State

Angus has some trouble getting his words out but does a little dance to loosen himself up. When he finally does get his words out he has a good point. Wellbeing is the new differentiator for the England football team. The coach is seeing how when the players are having fun and enjoying life this impacts their performance. So even though the current team isn’t as good as the previous team on paper, they are performing better as a result of this new culture of fun and wellbeing. This applies to all of us. We are our best selves when...

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