Celebrating Difference and Recognizing Oneness

I love diversity and the richness of different perspectives. I also love looking in the direction of the essence who we all are. It seems to me that whenever I look in that direction life gets simpler and lighter. I have noticed recently different conversations about the right way to look and point in this direction. They have the feeling for me of: "I know better than you. This way is better than that way. You can’t say this. You should do that."   So many rules. And for what? None of us have it right. What is being pointed to cannot...

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Who Knew? Letting Yourself Be Human Brings Out the Best in You!

Seeing stress as not being attached to the outside world has completely changed my relationship with it. When I thought my experience of stress was caused by things outside of me, I accepted it. I took it for granted and assumed that I would need things to change on the outside before I could feel better on the inside. When it looks this way, life is hard. Sometimes things aren’t going to change on the outside. Some things are permanent, like the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, not being able to have a biological child.   There...

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There Is Relief From Insecurity Simply From Understanding How the Mind Works

I was recently given feedback in a Mastermind group that I am part of that for someone with so much insecure thinking I sure get a lot done. I don’t know if you ever feel this way, but I feel at times like I am different than other people. I think I am more screwed up, that I am less than, that there is something wrong with me. This definitely happens less than it used to, but it still happens. What is different now is that I am much better than I used to be at ignoring these thoughts and...

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What About Grief?

After writing a blog on the transitory nature of thoughts and feelings and explaining how our feelings come from our thoughts, someone asked me, “What about grief?” From their question, it sounded to me like grief looked like something different than an internally generated experience. They were putting grief into a category of its own and seeing it as more than thought generated -- meaning it looked like their feelings were caused by something outside of themselves, something other than thought.   We all have areas of our lives that look like they fall into a different category than an inside-out generated...

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Eat Your Fruits and Vegetables (or not)! Let Your Wisdom Guide the Way

I just finished a 6-day juice fast and 2 (nearly 3) day water fast. I have never done an extended fast before. I wanted to try it out to see if it helped my skin. I am in no way promoting or recommending fasting for others. Like all of my posts, this is my personal experience. I am simply sharing what I am seeing. This is not to be interpreted as a prescription for healing or a sharing of “Truth.” It is me looking in the direction of my own wisdom hoping it will point you to look in the...

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We Box Ourselves in with Limiting Beliefs, and We Also Set Ourselves Free

I still get surprised by the invisible power of thought at times. Like the Henry Ford quote says: “Whether you think you can, or you think you can't--you're right.” I got it into my head that I can only write in the mornings. This morning I didn’t write. I got caught up in trying to unsuccessfully figure out a video editing software and spent most of the day ensconced in it.   When it came to this evening, I had some quiet time while Angus was picking up our youngest daughter from her job. I started to watch a video. Then I...

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Parenting Teens Teaches Me to Walk the Line of Letting Go and Loving Without Attachment

You've got a way to keep me on your side You give me cause for love that I can't hide For you I know I'd even try to turn the tide Because you're mine, I walk the line ~ Johnny Cash, I Walk the Line   I am sitting on the Anacortes Ferry on my way to Sooke, B.C. to visit my mother. It has docked at Friday Harbor. The harbor is full of pleasure boats. There is a stationary seaplane gently floating up and down on the water. It is a tranquil view. I’m cozy in my black Patagonia jacket, normal summer wear for me...

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Being an Imperfect Mother is Good for Your Kids

I heard one of my teacher's at the University of Santa Monica, Ron Hulnick Ph.D. say that you cannot damage your kids. This flies in the face of traditional psychology that believes a healthy attachment to the primary caregiver is what results in well-adjusted and happy children. However, from a spiritual perspective, if we all have innate well-being and mental health within us, if our essence is whole and cannot be damaged, then our environment and circumstances would not be able to damage us.   Knowing this does not make me not want to show us as the best parent I can be,...

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Don’t Be Afraid of Your Coping Mechanisms: They Are Your Best Wisdom in the Moment

I like the feeling of being on top of things. This is a comfortable place for my ego to hang out. I can get smug about this and feel very pleased with myself. Look at me! Look at how together I am! There are also times of growth that I really enjoy. When I am stepping into the unknown and don't have anything figured out. This experience is fun and exhilarating. I enjoy both the comfort of the known and the excitement of the unknown.   What I have more trouble enjoying and appreciating is the mess. I don't like feeling I am...

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Why I’m Not Making Any New Year’s Resolutions

This is the time of year when resolutions abound! It is traditional to make a fresh start on the first of January and be open to new beginnings. Out with the old and in with the new! The New Year inspires people to take action on being the best version of themselves.   What is your vision for yourself this year?   Mine includes having a house with closets and a garage that would make Marie Kondo proud. Enjoying pretty hands, fitting in to my Giorgio Armani suit that I bought after having two kids, but somehow, even though I am only two...

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