Blog Archives

I Am That Parent

I started off my therapeutic career working with parents with adolescents who were struggling. I saw the impact of substance abuse, eating disorders, school refusal, violent outbursts, arrests, running away from home, suicide attempts, and self-harm on parents and families. I sat with parents who felt hopeless and scared, but who were also courageous enough to do things differently. Even in the intensity of fearing for their child’s life they chose to do their best to walk a path of love and connection rather than one of punishment, judgment and seeking control.   Now as the parent of teenage daughters I am...

Read More

Rohini is Just So Forward

In this week’s Vlog, you get to see how Rohini's ability to take on the journey of life and course correct like a nimble sloop has shown a lot more virtue than Angus’ steady as you go freight ship! Rohini’s will to get out on the open sea as quickly as possible proves to be a lot more fruitful than Angus’ need to stay in the harbor worrying about the Leviathan.   Rohini and Angus are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders, and organizations to increase performance and success. They also love working with couples and helping them reduce conflict and...

Read More

The Soul-Centered Series: Webinar With Elsie Spittle

In this webinar, Elsie shares what she is seeing fresh regarding her understanding of the Principles. She takes you to the heart and soul of Sydney Banks's teaching and points beyond the words to the wisdom that is available to all of us.   To learn more about the six-month program The Soul-Centered Series with the original students of Sydney Banks click here....

Read More

The Answer to More Motivation and Greater Productivity

I love this story from the book Art & Fear by David Bayles and Ted Orland:   The ceramics teacher announced on opening day that he was dividing the class into two groups. All those on the left side of the studio, he said, would be graded solely on the quantity of work they produced, all those on the right solely on its quality. His procedure was simple: on the final day of class he would bring in his bathroom scales and weigh the work of the "quantity" group: fifty pounds of pots rated an "A", forty pounds a "B", and so...

Read More

Lost Car Key Frenzy

Angus had an adventure with lost car keys. His fear of disappointing others got in the way of his clarity and he lost his bearings. He knew he was back on solid ground when he was able to find humor in the situation. Angus was able to see how he had been revving his thinking up not realizing he had lost his bearings. Knowing when we are in a storm of thinking is helpful because we recognize it will pass. It is also more obvious to be more gentle with ourselves as we ride out the distress and easier to...

Read More

Help, I Am Hurting! Where is My Peace of Mind?

When I found myself writing similar messages to clients who were experiencing distress and who reached out for support, I thought it might be helpful to share my thoughts with a wider audience. Let me know in the comments if what I am sharing is helpful or if you have questions.   When you are upset it looks like another person or a circumstance is the cause of your distress. Your emotions make this feel very real. It does not occur to you that your experience is created inside of you. It is hard to have perspective and see that your thinking...

Read More

Changing Habitual Thought Patterns

We all have habitual thought patterns. Neuroscience has coined Canadian neuropsychologist's phrase, “neurons that fire together wire together.” This is very useful for automated activities that we don’t want to have to relearn from scratch every time, but it becomes problematic when we develop negative neural pathways that become automatic like Angus constantly reinforcing his statement that he is tired rather than just getting on with his day. The good news is that science is revealing the resilience of the brain in its neuroplasticity. The brain is far more adaptive and flexible than previously thought.   When looking beyond our habituated thoughts...

Read More

Healing Comes From a Shift in Understanding

I have been a fan of Tim Ferriss since he wrote The 4-Hour Workweek. I admire his zest for life and his willingness to try new things to improve the quality of his life. I also appreciate his generosity in sharing what he learns. I would love to have a conversation with him about the understanding of the Principles and innate mental health. I think it would reduce his suffering from depression and be a valuable understanding to share with his followers. Currently, he is providing significant support for psychedelic research, donating at least $100,000 to research on the use...

Read More

Bossiness is in the Eye of the Beholder

This is not an example of Angus at his best with listening. He normally does a better job of disguising his inattentiveness, but it is a good example of how we each live in our own separate reality. I can think I am being helpful and Angus can think I am bossy. What is even more amazing is I can be doing the same thing and from one state of mind, Angus can see me as helpful and from another state of mind he can see me as bossy. I can also be completely blind to my bossiness and see...

Read More

Love Is The Way Forward

I just watched the Royal Wedding of Prince Harry and Ms. Meghan Markle. I was surprised to find myself so deeply moved. I especially loved the rendition of ‘Stand By Me’ performed by Karen Gibson and the Kingdom Choir and Bishop Michael Curry’s Sermon. My favorite part of his sermon was:   …think and imagine a world where love is the way. Imagine our homes and families when love is the way. Imagine neighborhoods and communities where love is the way. Imagine governments and nations where love is the way. Imagine business and commerce when love is the way. Imagine this tired...

Read More