Elaine | Rohini Ross - Part 4

Angus Unchained

Rohini is getting over her Valentine's Day "grinchiness" and getting into the spirit of the day. Angus shares what he is seeing around the profound resilience we each have inside to regulate. We don't need to regulate ourselves. Our design is to regulate. No experience is wrong or abnormal it is all just part of the experience of being human. Seeing this helps us to be more comfortable with whatever our experience is.   Rohini can see how her resistance to her experience would often lead to conflict between Angus and her because she would try to self-regulate through regulating him. It...

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The Simple Way To An Easier Relationship

Our personal realities can look so separate and different. Angus has a very unique approach to taking care of an upset stomach and it works for him!   Understanding how separate our realities can look and recognizing that our experience comes from that unique reality we create is so helpful in relationships. In the example shared here, I got caught up in my personal version of reality where it felt like I was bad, wrong, not good enough, and it looked like Angus was responsible for me feeling that way. But that is not the truth.   That experience was a temporary reality that...

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Microdosing Truth

Angus comes up with a wacky metaphor of how we are all microdosing on truth whether we realize it or not. AND we all have the opportunity to choose to look within to truth and see what gets revealed to us. It is so easy to get preoccupied with having more experiences of pleasure and fewer experiences of pain that we don't realize there is another option altogether that is to step outside of the cycle. Without even changing it, stepping outside and having perspective on it gives us more peace and freedom. There is nothing wrong with our humanness...

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Take The Pressure Off

Take the pressure off and just be you! This is what allows relationships to flourish. I did used to get more frustrated and critical with Angus' absentmindedness, but that was about me being caught up in my thoughts and not him. Now I usually find it endearing and often very humorous. We are encouraging you to stop making up expectations and putting pressure on yourself to live up to those made up expectations. Instead, recognize that who you are is more than enough. You are beautiful, magnificent, glorious exactly as you are no matter what your thoughts, feelings and behaviors...

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Happy Birthday Angus!

We celebrated Angus's birthday which is very fitting as Angus shares his most senior moment to date, and he offers words of wisdom regarding busyness and the perils of becoming overly focused on checking off your To-Dos.   If you are interested in the New Year program 2020 INSIGHT we mentioned, here is the link: https://barbarapatterson.com/insight/   Angus & Rohini Ross are "the Rewilders". They love working with couples and helping them to reduce conflict and discord in their relationships by opening them up to their innate vitality and resilience. They work with couples who are struggling and couples who would like to deepen...

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The Key to a Better Relationship

If you want a better relationship forget, about your partner and forget about working on your relationship. It is all about you!   This is not selfish in the typical definition of selfish being lacking consideration for others and concerned chiefly with one's own personal profit or pleasure. It is Selfish in the sense of putting your true nature first and letting the rest take care of itself.   What does it mean to put your true nature first?   Only you can decide that for you. What it means for me is to have a sincere intention to wake up to who I am beyond...

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Remember This The Next Time You Are Upset

I no longer have a personal prayer. I have the prayer of aligning with that which is -- the impersonal flow of the divine that starts beyond space and time. We live in the experience of the illusion, and we forget about the divine. The clouds of thought disguise who we really are. As Hafiz so beautifully wrote:   You are God hiding from yourself. Remove all the “mine” -- that is the veil. … You are God in Drag!   Waking up to this is the direction I want to look in.   Not only are we God hiding from ourselves, but we also become attached to the hiding.   We...

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You Can’t Shout Someone Into Wellbeing

Angus and I have been moody buggers this week!   We are sharing our experience of losing the plot and finding our way again as a means to normalize the experience and to point to the temporary nature of this kind of experience.   This week for whatever reason we got gripped. It all started over soup. I was working late and Angus kindly made us soup for dinner. All good, until I didn’t like the soup and didn’t want to eat it. I am not usually a picky eater, but for some reason, the texture of the soup turned my stomach.   Angus took this...

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Toy Drive & Taking Things Personally

Our friend Paige is helping coordinate a toy drive for the 100 children at the San Fernando Valley Refugee Children's Center, in North Hills, CA   Many of the unaccompanied minors were in detention centers at the border and are hoping to get asylum. The little kids are with a parent and they have all escaped gangs and potential murder, back in Central America.   The Center: https://www.noestassolonorthhills.org   Here is the link for the toy drive wish list. When you order, please choose this address when it gives the prompt: Kelly Radinsky's Gift Registry. Click here for the link.   Regarding the Vlog, understand that it is normal...

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The Myth of No Upset In Healthy Relationships

Healthy relationships have room for each person's humanness. We don’t need to improve ourselves. In fact, the more we allow ourselves to be with what is in the moment the more room there is for love to show up. This doesn’t mean we are going to be loving with each other all the time. But it will be more likely. The less we try to change what is, the less suffering we have. The less suffering we have the more likely we are to show up with an open heart. This is easier when you remember that experience comes and...

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