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Freedom From Being A Slave to External Validation

My car lease expired at the end of last month so I went into the dealership after a good friend found me an amazing deal. Everything was completed ahead of time. I just needed to do the swap. Or so I thought. I forgot about the time in the finance office. When I was reminded of this, I walked into the finance office braced and ready for the reams of papers to sign. I sat down in the black vinyl chair ready for the task.   Then I was taken aback. Rather than a get down to business start. I was greeted...

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Coping Mechanisms Aren’t Rational — They Are Spiritual

The final Soul-Centered Series starts this Friday, and there are just a few spots left. It is with curiosity and excitement that Angus and I await to see who is going to complete the group of this final class.   I can feel the energy moving inside of me already. I always feel like the program starts as soon as you sign up for it, and Angus and I signed up for this back in April when we decided to do it one last time!   In the midst of the final preparations, I noticed that my habit of picking the skin around my...

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Try This Experiment If You Are Unhappy In Your Relationship

If you are unhappy in your relationship are you willing to try an experiment?    It is an experiment designed to reduce your suffering not to save your relationship. And whatever happens in terms of the outcome for your relationship, you will have the learning from the experiment. That goes with you even if the relationship ends.   Angus and I do our best to have no attachment to outcomes when working with our clients. We see our responsibility being to educate our clients so they can connect more deeply with their own wellbeing and see more clearly what gets in the way of...

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Love Is In The Air — The Impersonal Kind

I felt so moved reflecting on the participants in the next Soul-Centered Series these words for the first night flowed through me. Since the program doesn't start until October 11th, and I am feeling these words on September 21st, I know they won't be the words I speak when we get together, but I wanted to share them.   The inspiration behind the Soul-Centered Series is to create a space where like-minded people come together and look in the direction of what Sydney Banks pointed to in his teachings.  At the heart of what he shared, Sydney Banks was pointing to the...

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The Best Relationship Remedy

Relationship advice is usually focused on trying to cultivate more of a feeling of love that comes and goes rather than on waking up to your essence of love that is always there no matter what. It might seem counter-intuitive to focus on something that can only be found and experienced within when it looks like the issues are without involving two people not just oneself, but ultimately any experience of upset we experience comes from within.   It is the ultimate in empowerment, freedom, and liberation to see that what causes our internal experiences arises from our own thoughts and not...

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What Makes Relationships Work?

Angus and I are in the beautiful Pacific Northwest facilitating a four-day intensive with a couple. As I was reflecting on the intensive beforehand I was thinking about what it is that makes relationships work. Given that the content of each person’s experience is unique and each relationship is different, I was looking to see what is simple and unifying that applies to all relationships?   When I reflected on my own relationship, what occurred to me is that the less I am attached to my personal position the better my relationship is. The more I need things to be a certain...

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Love Is Not Only The Answer; It Is Also The Question And Everything Else In Between

Angus and I are hopefully heading back to LA as this blog post is being sent out. I am so used to writing my posts right before they get sent it feels strange to write something that won’t be published until two weeks from now.   One of the things that I noticed this week, is I can get a bit antsy before leaving on a trip. I usually deal with this by leaving packing to the last minute. This works for me because then I don’t spend that much time thinking about it so there is less time to worry. This...

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We Are All On Our Way To Being Nothing

“As long as you believe you are a body-mind, then your purpose is to become no purpose. You spend your energy becoming nothing. But do not believe you are nothing when you haven’t become nothing yet! Be honest with yourself. See where you are coming from by the way you react to your life situations every day.”  ~ Robert Adams   Intellectual interpretation and conceptual presentations of spiritual understanding are very different than what is shared from direct experience. And looking at my day-to-day life I see how far I am from being nothing. I see I frequently get caught up in...

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